I'm so, so lost…
A friend just sent me an e-mail saying how excited he is about the NFL starting tonight. I stared at my computer screen thinking… “What kind of man am I that I don’t know this?” A tear rolled down my cheek. “Am I crying?” What next? Shirts that match my socks? Umbrella drinks? Grey’s Anatomy?
Before my #2 son was born in March I knew all things NFL. Now I spend my days compiling lists of questions for our pediatrician and studying infant mortality rates of the Swine Flu. We were in the baby doctor’s office Wednesday for Crowley’s 6-month shots and check up. They were handing out particle masks to anyone with a child who had a fever above 100.
I took my son and marched right back out the door and waited in the hall. Until a mom and her little boy, both wearing masks, walked out to join me. AAAAAAAAAAH!
I have issues.
Among them, I didn’t know the NFL season was starting tonight? What the? I should have had this date circled on my Calendar months ago. I have crossed over a line somewhere. I might as well be sitting at a salon getting a pedicure talking about whether or not I think Ellen will do a good job replacing Paula on American Idol. ‘WHY DO I KNOW ELLEN IS REPLACING PAULA AND NOT THAT THE NFL STARTS TONIGHT?”
What has happened to me? And why am I calling them by their first names only, like we’re friends?
I’m going to go out to my garage and organize my tools. Grrrr… (I hope I have tissues out there.) MR
I’ll wear an air mask in your honor while whooping it up for the Titans.
Your mission tonight, should you choose to accept it, is to teach your son all about 1st-and-10! Perhaps we can minimize the testosterone leak in your household…
First, you have not lost your man card. Phew!
I imagine it happens to all people who have children. Your child has become your life now and that’s a good thing. So t o remedy this, go out, do something manly, drink a beer and I promise you will be fine.
OK… maybe you have crossed over the line. Go to the hardware and buy some tools and lumber and build something. It does not matter what it is, just build something.
Who are Ellen and Paula and what is American Idol?
Funny! So, so funny! Is it raining at your house? If not, go mow your lawn – you’ll feel better. :-)
I don’t want to chip nail.
Why don’t you just go shopping for a new bra and panties! Directv should just cancel your service…come on man! NFL is for real men, and you may have lost that title. But don’t worry, nobody has to know…as long as you don’t admit it on your blog!!! Wait…that ship has sailed! You’re screwed bud.
Seriously! Maybe I’ll just go to the mall tonight instead.
ROTFL – can’t breathe. Stop now I can’t take anymore! Poor Mike. It’s gonna be OK! LOLOLOL
I interviewed at Lowes recently, but I think they checked my man-card references…
yes indeed bob – i would save him the trip for bras and panties by sending him mine, but… i burned
mine 30 yrs ago – and bob, just a slight addition to
your comment… nfl is also for real women – just kidding – i do have a GREAT pool, expecially for small groups… rarely a tie – anyone wants this weeks pool sheet, i will be glad to email a copy -
you can still play for fun sun & mon (2 games on
mon mike) to get an idea of the point system!